Planes, Trains, and... Well, Just Trains

In my previous post, I explained the history behind my love for trains, and how absoulutely giddy I was to board a six-day railway journey on the Trans-Siberian Express.

I was young and naive at the time. Let us begin.

Brendan and I had hoped to buy ourselves a two-person sleeping compartment in first-class for a little comfort and privacy. But since you can't buy train tickets until 45 days before departure and tour group companies get first dibs, all the first-class compartments were sold out and we were stuck in second-class, which only offers four-person compartments. Not that I'm anti-social or anything, but you can imagine how long six days would have been with the wrong bedfellows. So we bought all four beds to have the compartment to ourselves. It actually ended up being about $100 more than two beds in first-class, but better safe than sorry, and we actually gained a bit more elbow room.

We boarded our train Tuesday evening in Moscow, found our compartment, got settled, and crashed. Sleeping was a cinch.. nothing like being gently rocked to sleep by rail!

Wednesday morning came soon enough, and I went looking for the shower. We had located toilet/sink water closets on either side of our carriage, but couldn't figure out where people went to clean themselves. When I asked one of the conductors, he shrugged at me like I was nuts.

Wait, so no showers?

No showers on a six-day train?

Seriously, no showers?

Um...

What?

I strive to be as low-maintenance as possible during my everyday life, and obviously I've had to make some pretty big concessions on this trip already. But I've never even camped for more than a day or two at a time without at least a jump in the river. How does one not shower for six days? How does one survive?

One survives just fine, it turns out. A Russian cup-o-soup and a large, warm Chinese beer can do wonders for a broken heart. You heard it here, folks.

Brendan and I did a lot of reading for the first few days. I'd elaborate if I could, but that's truly all we did. Our senses were a little fried after three major cities in a row, so it was a relief to be forced to relax and admire the Siberian countryside through the window (gorgeous!). Once in a while we'd reach a stop and everyone would get off the train for a ten-minute leg stretch and to load up on goodies. Some stops had better goodies than others, but thankfully no shortage of Russian cup-o-soup (our chopsticks were tragically lost early on).

At some point, the Trans-Siberian Express splits into two routes. Travelers can either keep going due east until they reach the eastern edge of Siberia, or veer to the southeast toward China via Mongolia. The latter is actually called the Trans-Mongolian Express, and that's what we chose.

On the fourth day (Friday), we crossed the border into Mongolia. The huge plus was a new Mongolian-themed dining car (with a sweet tiki bar and free vodka shots!). The huge minus was the border crossing experience itself, which meant we were stopped and quarantined in our bunks for about five hours. You'd think a few more large, warm Chinese beers would help dull the boredom, right? So did we. But here's the problem. When the train is at a station- any station- the bathrooms are locked to keep passengers from flushing their business onto the tracks. Obviously we hadn't really thought that one through. It was painful.

Mongolia must be the only country where a majority of its residents still live in tents (or yurts, as they're referred to these days). We spotted a few guys on horseback galloping alongside the train. It's like the Wild West in the middle of the Gobi Desert.

By the fifth day (Saturday), we felt like we had quite a bit more ground to cover based on our train schedule. When I asked one of the conductors what time we were due to arrive in Beijing on Sunday afternoon, he shrugged at me like I was nuts.

We arrive in Beijing on Monday, dummy.

Oh.

Seven days without a shower?

Um...

I locked myself in the bathroom and washed my hair in the sink in protest. The Korean lady waiting for the toilet was not amused.

On the sixth day (Sunday), we crossed the border into China. The experience was a lot like Mongolia's with an added bonus: since Chinese train tracks are a different size than Russian/Mongolian train tracks, each train carriage must be jacked up about ten feet into the air while a band of Chinese mechanics replaces every single set of wheels before the journey can continue. It's a holdover from the days where either China or Russia didn't want the other country invading them via railway. I forget which country. I forget a lot of things these days.

Anyway, that whole process took about eight hours. The bathrooms were locked. To pass the time I picked a fight with B, who wanted none of it and passed out on Tylenol PM instead.

On the seventh and final day (Monday), we actually got our first glimpse of the Great Wall under a blanket of fog. That incredible view was like getting a Christmas bonus after a grueling fourth quarter. Job well done, Morans. Welcome to China.

So... we made it to Beijing! It's been a little over 24 hours and I'm already in love with the restaurant down the street.

Until next time, I remain,
Sarah "I Survived the Trans-Siberian Express and All You Got Was This Lousy Story" Moran

Comments

[Clark]

Sarah you frickin rock.

[JR]

Sarah, that picture of you holding the oranges(or whatever they are) is hilarious. The expression on your face brings me to tears.

[s0m31]

I got lucky, I was coming here to get some of the gorgeous pics and saw the new update. So I guess the infamous Morans are to good to share a room, I'm with you on that. I can't imagine what it must have been like to not have any showers for six or seven days, horrible I suppose. Although I did do some hiking on the Appalachian Trail once, it was a two week trip, but we had places we could stop. If two conductors think you're nuts, then perhaps you are. Or maybe they are, who knows. I think I'll head over to Brendan's blog and see if he's got an update. The pics are great, have fun and stay safe. Until next time, I remain, John "I Survived the Story of the Trans-Siberian Express and All I got Were These Amazing Pictures" S.

-John-

[Bunny Emerald]

Yay! You made it! Love the pics and descriptions. You deserve a nice long shower.

[Tom S]

Glad that you survived the 6, 7 days train ride. Great story and pictures.

[Joe]

You made it!! You survived the trans-siberian railway. I can barely make it down the trans-suburban roadway, so kudos to you. It was fun google mapping your ride this past week, trying to figure where you were. Keep the posts coming, Sarah. You're an inspiration.

[DarlaJo]

O man I can't imagine 8 hours without a bathroom. When I know that there isn't a bathroom around that makes me have to go even more, You deserve some kind of award for surving that trip.

[ken]

six days without taking a shower man you guys are awsome for lasting that long after two days I'd be so cranky happy travels

[Howard]

Great post, Sarah! The pictures are gorgeous and the blog is actually somewhat educational. What you have here is the classic "edu-tainment." I'm hoping that your hair didn't turn brown as a result of not showering...
Good luck and happy travels!

[Howard]

WOW!!! What an absolute F-ing adventure... If your marriage stays intact thru this year-long trip, you will be the best-of-friends for your entire lives. I think this was your most exciting (vicariously-speaking) post so far. I would've had to Swiss-Army-Knife myself (or someone else) in the first 2 days on that train. You using it as chopsticks instead shows a lot more resiliency than I've had for 30 years. Luvyaz...

[Text Pirate]

Great story! I never thought about rails having a different gauge at a border crossings. More amazing then that, I never saw someone use the little fork on the Swiss Army knife. Two firsts for me!

This stuff is too good. You're going to have to write a book.

[zoë]

The oranges picture is priceless. Especially the man next to you, and his brilliant pants.

[Gabe]

Great pictures, and I don't agree, it was not a lousy story it was very... amusing

[Jamie]

Guys how about some new podcast. My wife and I watch them at night in bed. Better than Leno! Thanks for taking us along the journey with you.

Take care
Jamie and Jeri

[BhamAaron]

I have been jonesin for the latest Traveling Morans installment and this entry was the fix I so desperately needed. For some reason I think the train you rode on played Christmas tunes filled with guitar solos, I dunno why though. Oh, and it looks like you stole that guys oranges. "Why you take my oranges lady?"
I guess I'll go read Brendan's blog till you get another one up (gahhhh), but tell him there better be pictues this time!

[Liana]

Wow, those pictures of the Great Wall are really... wow! Not that I was out-of-it while reading the rest of your post, but when those pictures popped up, it was like a smack in the face - I love them!!!

Hope you guys got some good footage on that exciting train ride - thank goodness we don't have smell-o-vision yet! ;)

Still think your hair looks great that color!

[M-whY]

Great trip! Glad you made it. I remember my trans mongolian journey... my 4 bunk cabin was invaded by some not so friendly characters and it was hell.

Did you get to see lake baikal? Or try omul?

Oh, and Mongolian 'yurts' are called 'gers'. Technically the same thing, but I think you run the risk of offending a Mongolian if you call his home a yurt. :)

[M-whY]

Great trip! Glad you made it. I remember my trans mongolian journey... my 4 bunk cabin was invaded by some not so friendly characters and it was hell.

Did you get to see lake baikal? Or try omul?

Oh, and Mongolian 'yurts' are called 'gers'. Technically the same thing, but I think you run the risk of offending a Mongolian if you call his home a yurt. :)

[Bryan]

I love the site, Grreeat travel site!

[Monkshack]

I couldn't have laughed harder! I can definitely feel your pain! Keep up the great stories!

[Jan]

I've been thoroughly enjoying your accounts of your adventures, especially the whole train trip/hygiene challenge. I get a kick out of each picture, but when I saw that first Great Wall picture, I actually said, out loud, "Wow." Not my most articulate moment, but it was completely sincere.

I hope you and Brendan are enjoying documenting your travels in pictures and words as much as we are enjoying riding along vicariously. Thanks for taking the time.

[Ashlea]

That guy, in the picture with you buying the oranges, was looking at you like you were crazy!

Seriously though--those pictures of the Great Wall of China gave me goosebumps!

Congratulations on surviving 7 days without a shower!

[Justin]

I think its great that you guys are doing this.New places,new people & new experiences (Locked Bathrooms & Lack of showers).Ive been watching you guys since the old Screen Savers days.the damm good downloads.All that stuff was great.Its not the same anymore without you guys there.I must say that its great to hear from you guys again on this site.This is my new "Gem of the internet".Well,hope everything goes well for you guys till the next post.Oh and dont worry about the water bill for the place you guys take a shower at.You deserve it..

Justin

[Chandera]

Hey sarah..I am a big fan of yours and i am from malaysia..there is attack of the show here but delayed episode's..anyway i didn't know you left the show and got married to brendan..

take care

[Peter]

Nice trvel report here. Did come along because I was looking for some information about the mongolian dining car. Did a similar trip back in 2005. (see backlink for pics. sorry, text in German)

Interesting, most Americans claim about "no showers" in the train, but I think there are a lot of people living without shower on this world. When I was a kid not everybody in the town had a shower and when we spent our holydays with the grandparents, we had to wash ourself with a rag everyday.

Bad luck for you drinking beer while waiting at the border!

btw: Yes, I'm building real trains - also for the Russians.